Sexpresso

Disclaimer:  The title of this entry is taken from a news story. I didn't come up with it.

     So I was listening to my regular radio show (Philips Phille on Real Radio 104.1. I like talk radio, sue me) when they cut to the news portion. In amongst the usual fluff stories there was one that caught my attention. Not for its fast-breaking, life-changing, news-worthiness, but for the ridiculousness in its subject. It appears that in one state a group of lawmakers, in their quest to save us all from the evils of life, have tried to subjugate an "adult only" policy for a coffee stand.
     That's right. A java counter had the audacity to put beautiful women in scantily clad garb as their barristas. Now I don't understand why this would be a prerequisite for selling coffee, yet I think its a pretty good marketing ploy. Whether we admit it or not, sex will always sell....coffee. And I applaud any 'Sexy Starbucks' corporation that feels it has to go this route in order to compete. As long as the girls don't burn themselves with the carafes I am for anything that gets a customer in a store.
       However that is not what really got me thinking. It was that the lawmakers were trying to ban this one certain company for the use of it cause it would bring about a lower morale value to the world. And there is where I don't concur.
       Modern society is at a dichotomy with itself. On one side people want the Norman Rockwell view of life where everything is perfect and just uttering the word "kissing" could get you scorned in the town square with a giant scarlet "A" placed upon your person. And upon the other side we have Hooters; Tilted Kilt; Show-Me's; Gazzongas; Treasure Tavern; Peckers; McDonalds.  (Okay, so Micky D's isn't one of these flesh-raunts, but I guy can hope.) Yet we don't seem to mind that these places exist. In fact we take our children and grandparents to them to have a good ole family night out with some exciting new entertainment.
       I am a straight male of age. I will not try to perpetrate a lie that I have never frequented these places. Cause I have. Multiple times. That's not to say I am a regular, but I have been inside and find them harmless. I don't find it offensive, oppressive, ornamental, or degrading to the women (and men) who work at these places to do what they are told. Its just a food joint when you look at it from a logical point of view. And its not like the employees don't know what they are getting themselves into when they collect their checks.
       Seeing bare flesh is a common occurrence today. The beach is filled with people just waiting to de-robe and show off what they got. In some cases I wish they wouldn't until they have spent some time in a gym, but who am I to talk. I am a pasty white man who, no matter how many miles I run on my treadmill, can't seem to get rid of my one love handle. And if you walk around that beach for about 47 seconds you have already seen less clothing on a person than any of these companies require of their staff. These flesh-raunts are actually quite tame when you look at it that way.
       So these lawmakers really got under my skin trying to equate a coffee shop with the porn room in the back of a Family Video. To them it was obscene and grotesque and I should be carded in order to order a cup a joe. How dare I need my caffeine in the morning. I would suggest they focus on upholding the rules that don't seem counterproductive to a society that has already conceded that we can handle places where women and men wear something slightly provocative to entice a certain clientele to give them better tips.
       In conclusion I hope we all can just stop thinking about what the server is wearing and order grandma and the kids some chicken wings. Cause they are really good in some Honey Mustard.